According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, approximately 12 percent of women of child-bearing age in the United States have difficulty getting or staying pregnant. Here are some ways you can support women facing this struggle:
- Offer classes and events that don’t restrict participation. For example, mother-daughter teas can be heartbreaking if you don’t have a daughter to bring.
- Honor the loss of a child through miscarriage or a failed adoption. It’s hard to know what to say, but flowers, cards, and meals say, “I care.” Don’t ask if you can bring a meal; say, “Let me bless you with a meal. When can I bring it?”
- Consider rewording “baby dedication” to “children’s dedication” in order to include new members who haven’t dedicated their children elsewhere as well as families who have adopted older children.
- Treat new adoptions like new births. If your church brings meals for new moms, recognize adoptive moms as new moms too. Throw a shower or party for adopted children, even if they are older.
- Teach adoption-friendly language. No one wants to be asked in front of their children if their child is a “real” son or daughter or if his or her “real” mom didn’t want them. When you talk about adoption, realize children are probably listening.
- Offer your time. If you know of a woman who is going through infertility or a troubled pregnancy, offer the present of presence. Ask if she’d like you to sit in the waiting room during a doctor’s visit or arrange a meeting for a snack or meal afterward.
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